Who's Afraid of Community Theatre?

October 4, 2007

It’s twelve o’clock on a bright, sunny Sunday afternoon. I’m riding a bike down a tree lined street. I’m rushing because I’m late for rehearsal for a play in which I’m acting.

I decide to stop at a rundown supermarket for a snack. I order a sandwich from the deli counter, which is in the lower level of this split-level market. As I head out the door with my sandwich, I decide to ride off in a shopping cart and leave my bike behind, thinking this might get me to rehearsal faster.

As I ride through the streets standing on the back of the cart, I have the feeling I’m being followed. I’m terrified I’ll be caught and punished for stealing the cart.

I arrive at a mostly empty school building and wander the darkened hallways, passing by a library and several classrooms until I finally find the theatre.

I’m now on the stage with several actors. I recognize two of them, Helen Mirren and Swoosie Kurtz. At first I think the play we’re rehearsing is Who’s Afraid of Virginia Wolf? or maybe a Tennessee Williams play, but soon I realize it’s a play about a community theatre mounting a production of Who’s Afraid of Virginia Wolf?

A disagreement has broken out between the director and a few of the actors. Swoosie and I hide behind a loveseat far upstage waiting for the argument to pass. Meanwhile, a very tiny Helen Mirren floats above the stage. She is playing the part of a fairy who oversees the production. Swoosie and I are amazed that Helen’s dedication to her craft has actually transformed into a palm sized sprite.